If you value your freedom, money, and sanity...

[ArchStanton]

Then consider very carefully before having children .

 

My daughter shares some character defects, er...my wife says I should call them idiosyncrasies in "public", with Elly May Clampett.  As such, she has convinced herself that she needs a pot-bellied pig.  In turn, she has convinced me to give her the opportunity to experience the joys of livestock ownership.  Growing up in a household that had livestock (cattle), I don't think they make good pets.  In fact, I think they make terrible "pets".  So yeah.

 

And now, without further ado, I give you the project that consumed my entire afternoon, the "Mr. Waddles Enclosure" v1.0

 

 

 

Chicken wire to keep the little porker from burrowing his way out.

 

 

 

 

[Diffident]

You have to house break Mr. Waddles so he can stay in the house.

[ArchStanton]

So, when I caved and told her "Yes, you can get a pig".  The next thing outta my mouth was "but it will be an outside ONLY pet!".  I know I'm going to come home one day and find "Waddles" in my living...

 

My wife and daughter will have some story prepped about how "it was too cold" or "there might be a tornado" or "the Canadians are invading"...

[Fluxmaven]

I have been around my fair share of livestock. Pigs were by far the worst. If I ever move back out in the country I'd just have a couple laying hens and call it a day. 

 

Good luck with Mr. Waddles. Hopefully your daughter doesn't lose interest too quickly and have him end up as your pet.

[EHW Ai]

@ArchStantonWill you be allowed to take Mr. Waddles truffle hunting on off-days?

 

 

Edited April 4, 2022 by iamjanco

[Alastair]

Hey look on the bright side. at least you have a source of farm fresh bacon and pork right at hand. 

[UltraMega]

As someone who has lived in the dense parts of California all my life, this is like something out of another world 

[ArchStanton]

9 hours ago, Fluxmaven said:

Hopefully your daughter doesn't lose interest too quickly and have him end up as your pet.

I see you have played this game before.

 

9 hours ago, iamjanco said:

Will you be allowed to take Mr. Waddles truffle hunting on off-days?

If there are any truffles in Tennessee, I highly doubt Waddles will be motivated enough to seek them out.  I'll be lucky if he is willing to eat the multitude of acorns around the house and yard.

 

7 hours ago, Alastair said:

at least you have a source of farm fresh bacon and pork right at hand.

Sadly, I don't think it will work that way.  When Waddles kicks the bucket, I will be expected to dig a grave and bury him with due "decorum and respect".  We have a "pet cemetery" on the hillside opposite the pond.

 

[Snakecharmed]

I have a friend with two indoor pet pigs. Nothing in this thread surprises me.

[The Pook]

27 minutes ago, ArchStanton said:

We have a "pet cemetery" on the hillside opposite the pond.

 

 

I seen that movie, bad idea 

[Sir Beregond]

13 hours ago, ArchStanton said:

"the Canadians are invading"...

 

At which point you have plenty of "Canadian Bacon" to share!

Edited April 4, 2022 by Sir Beregond

[EHW Ai]

3 hours ago, The Pook said:

 

I seen that movie, bad idea 

 

yeah, i was thinking the same thing.

 

3 hours ago, Sir Beregond said:

 

easier said than done. thank God Alex Anderson, et al, for Dudley Do-Right though.

Edited April 4, 2022 by iamjanco

[Darkpriest667]

Getting married, but got a vasectomy

[Alastair]

4 hours ago, ArchStanton said:

I see you have played this game before.

 

If there are any truffles in Tennessee, I highly doubt Waddles will be motivated enough to seek them out.  I'll be lucky if he is willing to eat the multitude of acorns around the house and yard.

 

Sadly, I don't think it will work that way.  When Waddles kicks the bucket, I will be expected to dig a grave and bury him with due "decorum and respect".  We have a "pet cemetery" on the hillside opposite the pond.

 

I'm sure you can find a way to fake a death and a burial.  

[ArchStanton]

1 minute ago, Alastair said:

I'm sure you can find a way to fake a death and a burial.

Okay, yes, your honor, guilty as charged.  I have done both previously.  Some of the "grave markers" have nothing below them, and one dog did not pass "peacefully in her sleep" without some assistance from me (she was very sick and old, the Veterinarian knew he had nothing more to offer her but couldn't summon the testicular fortitude required to admit it to my wife's face).

[ArchStanton]

14 minutes ago, Darkpriest667 said:

Getting married, but got a vasectomy

Now all you need is a few felonies on your record to make an end run around the adoption option .